(photo taken from http://www.flickr.com/photos/mtbphoto/124430789)
Often times, I find we particularly have a hard time with family because they look at us like traitors. In their minds, we’re now Turks! We’ve gone over to the OTHER side.
And for Greeks, that’s just about the worst thing you can do! I’m serious. You can come home pregnant (outside of marriage) or basically become an atheist and still look better to your mom than if you become the baboolas, the big monster Muslim.
See, for many of us Greek Muslims, we still want to keep our culture along with our Islam. And there is no problem with that as long as we don’t indulge in forbidden acts. But how do we find that middle path?
When I think Greek, I think of a Big, Fat, Greek Wedding. Seriously.
A big loud, traditional dancing party with food for the entire village. Drinking, music, pure wildness and kissing from cheek to cheek. Everyone knows everyone. And a place where really, anything goes.
Try finding the middle path now! As you can see, it’s hard at times. Eventually, I came to grips with it and learned to take the good and throw out the bad. Obviously, no more Greek weddings for me! I now spend a lot more time with family, choosing the environment carefully.
I’m very careful not to admonish others about their lifestyle choices but make it very clear to them how I choose to live my lifestyle and they cannot sway me otherwise. In fact, I learned to give dawah through my actions and not my tongue, and now I’m a lot more respected than ever before. In fact, my mom coined my new nickname, ei kaloygria (the nun).
So, the best advice I can give to new converts is to seek knowledge first. Find a good mentor and group of friends who are pious and knowledgeable in Islam that you can emulate.
Islam is compelling because it’s so simple and natural. With further prodding, Islam can also be very deep and complex because it covers every single aspect of our lives. So, when learning more about the details of Islam, it’s always best to go to people of knowledge. As they say, you are who your friends are.
What are your experiences or advice about culture and Islam?
My aunt told me recently what really bothered her about my conversion to Islam. My aunt is also my nouna, and she feels that she can no longer be called my godmother. It also bothers her that I took down all my icons in my room and I can’t pray to saints anymore.
As Greek Muslims we know our religion comes first and when it comes to practices of our Orthodox Christian family we know what we can and can’t do. Most, if not all, is in the “can’t do” list–but our families are the ones who view it like this–“that convert can’t do this and that….” We see Islam as a blessing and are happy to accept what we believe will help us gain self-purification and the contenance of Allah, the Most-Compassionate. We believe we have been given something better than what our past deen could offer. I came across this hadith:
Prophet Muhammad, pbuh, once saw the Ansaar celebrating a certain day. He inquired about that and was informed: This is one of two days that we used to celebrate in Jaahiliyyah (pre-Islaamic ignorance) and we continue to do so. He replied: Nay! Allaah has substituted for you two better days: the day of al-Fitr and the day of al-Adhhaa. [Authentic; narrated by Ahmad, an-Nasaaee, and others]
The eids of al-Fitr and al-Adhhaa are better for us than our Pascha and Christmas. In my opinion, this can be symbolic of Islam replacing all that was jahilliyah in our traditions that were aparently the core of Greek identity.
We need to show our families that there is more to being Greek than following traditions related to the Orthodox Church. I don’t know about your own families, but mine do not know much about their own religion and rather accept it only because it is their heritage and culture. I think this is why many of our fellow Greeks think it is such a scandelous thing to dissociate ourselves with our past religion. Hanging icons in the house and praying in front of them, lighting kandilia, making the sign of the cross, going to church, saying “Christos Anesti” for Pascha, taking communion, praying to saints…all these practices are considered “greek” in the eyes of our fellow Greeks.
If we follow the Islamic way of life, I think what is good for us will make itself apparant. What is far more meaningful to us and better for us Greeks is still there for us to call a part of OUR culture, heritage and traditions. Such things like the Greek language, our diverse cuisine, the good characteristics of being Greek like hospitality and love for family which can be translated into the Islamic way of life.
Sure, we can’t have that BIG FAT Greek Wedding that our Yaya always wanted for us, but there is still so much MORE to being Greek! Alhamdulillah.
Br. Nikos, I think you are definitely right, especially the part about our families thinking we have gone into identity crisis. They don’t realize that we can be Muslim AND Greek.
One thing that really helped me with my parents is to tell them upfront what will change and what will not. For example, in the beginning I would say things like, I’m not wearing hijab right now, but I will be in the future or when I get married, he will be a Muslim. I think this made a huge difference because when I do those things, there is no surprise and it gives them time to get used to the change before I go and change. Also, I would state what things won’t change, for example, spending time with family, etc.
I’ve noticed that some converts don’t do this and then when it comes time to do these actions, their families go balistic and usually persuade the convert to compromise in their faith in some way.
In the end, it’s all about educating them about your new lifestyle.
You do realise that the Muslim Arabs deprived the Roman empire from many of its productive areas (why? partly because the most heretical subjects in Egypt, Syria etc. joined them) and later, the Muslim Turks captured the Polis (why? partly because they offered better-to-no taxation to the Anatolians who were quick to join them and forget their identity. of course the Christian subjects were taxed…) You do, of course, realise that Christianity was the ONLY thing that kept us from becoming completely Turkified when we were under dhimmitude (yeah, there wouldn’t be any “Greeks” to speak of), the only thing that kept us -together- and the MOST important, if not the ONLY part of our Romaic identity? Also, I suppose that you are familiar with the origin of my nick?
You’re suggesting that we throw all that away. I guess we already threw the “Romaic” part away so the “Christian” one might as well follow. Nikos above suggested that “our language is also an important part of our identity”. While that might be true in some contexts (let’s not forget all of the Greek Arvanites, Vlachs etc. who felt Greek despite their language), I also guess that our Koine Greek liturgy will be replaced with Arabic. What will there be left?
All that being said (and asked), good luck in your future endeavours.
EllasEllinonXristianon, thank you for your post and intention for dialogue.
Let’s clear a few things up from the begining. There is a DIFFERENCE between culture and religion. For ex.
Greek Muslim
Arabic Muslim
Chinese Muslim
Indian Muslim
Turkish Muslim
Greek Christian
Arabic Christian
Arabic Jew
Chinese Buddhist
Indian Hindu
Turkish Christian
The first is your culture and you cannot change that no matter what. You are born into it and it depends on what your parents are. For example, both my parents are Greeks, therefore I am a Greek.
The second is your religion that you choose. I choose to practice Islam because I submit to the will of our Creator, One God, who created all of us.
Just because I chose to be a Muslim does not turn me into an Arab and I am not “Turkified”, whatever that means.
With that said, yes, there is a lot of animosity between Greeks and Turks from past history but that doesn’t change the fact that I am both Greek AND Muslim and enjoy it. 🙂
Hope that clears it up.
I agree with you wholeheartedly greekmuslim. We cannot choose our culture or ethnic identity. But we can choose our actions, beliefs, etc. My family’s church has a good number of Arab Christians. They do not speak Greek, but share the same Orthodox faith as many Greeks, Russians, Bulgarians, etc….
Living in America, people of Greek heritage, although many do not speak Greek, have a very strong sense of who they are. Their culture, cuisine, traditions, etc. are still very much alive. My great-grandparents immigrated to America and three generations later, my family is still very Greek, even though most of us don’t speak the language anymore. I guess many Greek-Americans are like the Vlachs and Arvanites that EllasEllinonXristianon mentioned.
I should have mentioned the Pontic Greeks who still live in northern Turkey. Not the Christian Pontics but the Muslim Pontics. After the genocide in the early 20th century, the Greeks and Armenians that remained were Muslim. Perhaps Christianity was considered such a part of Greekness, the Muslim Greeks were overlooked or not noticed at all in Attaturk’s time. But my point is that there are still Greek-speaking and Armenian-speaking villages in Turkey. Their culture is very much alive too. Take their music and dances for example.
Also, remember that most Muslims do not speak Arabic (or Turkish for that matter!). Take the Indonesians for example. Yes, the Greek Orthodox Church did much to preserve Greek identity during the 400 years of Turkish occupation. We should all be thankful for this. But I’d argue that this was not because of religion but because of a basic need to preserve who we are. If every Greek had turned Muslim during the turkokratia, the same need would be there. Greeks would not have forgotten their language, heritage, etc. no more than Indonesians have forgotten their own.
I like the dialogue that goes on here on this website. Let’s keep it up.
very interesting, thanks!
I have added a link to your site here:
http://www.talkcyprus.org/forum/viewtopic.php?p=86295#86295
cheers!
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hey i really like this and very understanding
I’m not a Greek myself but i could agree with you in some sense.